Canwest Broadcasting and Lone Eagle Entertainment have announced an English-Canadian version of Wipeout.  The Endemol Group format has contestants run obstacle courses that aren’t cribbed from Takeshi’s Castle and Sasuke, oh no.  No further details about Wipeout Canada have been announced, aside from a 2011 airdate.

This isn’t the first version of Wipeout to hit Canadian shores.  Wipeout Québec, which debuted in 2009, currently airs thrice-weekly on V.  This has previously been mentioned by Steve Faguy, who points out the basic flaw in the Wipeout Canada press release.

I have a feeling Wipeout Canada will be cut-rate, given Lone Eagle Entertainment’s game show past.  The company is going from You Bet Your Ass, Inside the Box and Game On to Wipeout Canada.  Wipeout is a far cry from dinky podiums and a slumming Stewart Francis.

Wipeout Canada is a better fit for GameTV, which needs higher-profile shows than Love Handles and, uh, Supermarket Sweep.  GameTV is such a quaint channel.  Reruns of The Mad Dash and Just Like Mom sound far more appealing than a second season of Carlawood.  Maybe it’s just me.

New episodes of Departures, Which Way To…, Word Travels and Angry Planet will air in March 2010, as part of Outdoor Life Network’s weekend lineup.

Departures will begin its third season March 6, 2010 at 10:00 PM ET/7:00 PM PT.  The other three shows debut March 7, 2010.  Which Way To… begins at 9:00 PM ET/6:00 PM PT, followed by Word Travels at 10:00 PM ET/7:00 PM PT and Angry Planet at 10:30 PM ET/7:30 PM PT.

All four shows are travelogues, which means they’re under the radar as far as CanCon goes.  OLN is decent at mounting documentary-type shows, something the channel doesn’t get enough credit for.

Having typed that, Rogers wants OLN to feature outdoor-themed comedies, animated shows and “stick and ball” sports.  That’s what OLN needs, the Toronto Blue Jays and twenty-one-year-old reruns of Mosquito Lake.  Rogers’ business decisions make me want to bang my head into a wall.

Cra$h & Burn, Showcase’s first stab at an hourlong drama series, will partner with BBC Worldwide for international distribution of the show.

Cra$h & Burn will feature at the 2010 BBC Showcase, where potential broadcast and cable suitors will eye its nine-and-a-half hours.  Creator Malcolm MacRury and star Luke Kirby will attend the event.

Cra$h & Burn has just completed its first season on Showcase.  I wasn’t too high on the show when it debuted, but Cra$h & Burn has become very good in recent weeks.

The show has become more-or-less straight drama with comedic flourishes.  The writing is gutsy enough to (mild spoiler, kids) write off Dan Duran’s character near the end of Cra$h & Burn’s first season.  It’s become a good fit for Showcase.

The deal with BBC Worldwide strengthens the show’s chances for renewal.  I hope Showcase isn’t stupid enough to cancel Cra$h & Burn, or put it up on blocks like it has Testees.  Speaking of which, whatever happened to Shattered?

As of today, Pure Pwnage has an exact airdate.  The show will debut on Showcase Friday, March 12, 2010 at 10:00 PM, for an eight-episode first season.

This site has mentioned Pure Pwnage before, and not much has changed since November 25, 2009.  Seven of ten behind-the-scenes webisodes are currently up at www.purepwnage.com/tv/ and showcase.ca.

Guest stars for Pure Pwnage’s first season include Steve “Lips” Kudlow, Billy Mitchell and Kenny Hotz.  Not to niggle, but what does the lead singer/guitarist for Anvil have to do with gaming?

Canwest’s press release for Pure Pwnage describes what “to pwn,” “1337,” “n00b” and FPS mean.  That’s sort of lame, but at least Canwest doesn’t get Derek Harvie’s name wrong.  Oh, wait.

Uh…the press release doesn’t contain the phrase “surprise buttsecks.”  Hey, there’s a positive!  I knew I’d find one!

Howard Bernstein of Medium Close-Up has posted a “very trustworthy rumour” (his words) that Lloyd Robertson will resign from his role as CTV National News anchor very soon.

Robertson has refuted the rumour, dismissing it as “a fascinating work of fiction” on CKNW’s The Bill Good Show.  The 76-year-old anchor insists that, contrary to Medium Close-Up’s assertion, he is not tired of the daily grind.

Lloyd Robertson is one of North America’s longest-lasting anchors, at least on a national level.  Robertson has anchored CTV National News since 1976, sharing the desk with Harvey Kirck until 1984.  He previously anchored CBC’s The National from 1970 to 1976.  The man is a Canadian broadcasting legend.

On the other hand, Robertson’s 76.  Robertson is a classy and durable anchorman, but I wonder how much time the man has left.  Robertson has to pass the torch at some point in the near future.

I should note that I do not watch CTV National News.  I find it too self-important.  I respect Robertson for his longevity, but network news broadcasts as a whole are obsolete in the digital age.  Robertson, Kevin Newman and Peter Mansbridge are all talking heads in the grand scheme of things.

CAUTION: May Contain Nuts (APTN: airdates here) has been given a complete overhaul since its first season.  A live audience and studio sets have been mounted.  The opening and closing credits have been completely made over.  The insipid title hasn’t changed, but one can’t have everything.

The problem with CMCN’s first season is that it’s a weaker variation of the shows it’s emulating, namely Human Giant and The Whitest Kids U’ Know.  While castmembers Howie Miller and Sheldon Elter are talented, the show is just there, a placeholder meant to attract viewers bored shitless by Saturday Night Zombie.

The second-season premiere shows definite improvement in CMCN’s quality.  The show works better live-to-tape in front of an audience.  The castmembers are more comfortable, the overall presentation more energetic.  It’s like CMCN knows it needs to improve, and is acting on that initiative.  I’m impressed.

Miller and Elter are the stars of CAUTION: May Contain Nuts.  This isn’t due to APTN’s aboriginal focus, as non-native Matt Alden is head writer.

The non-native castmembers aren’t as distinctive for some reason, aside from James Higuchi.  On any other comedy network, Miller and Elter would still be key castmembers.  They give CMCN so much of its personality.

The sketches themselves are a mixed bag.  A “CMCN News” sketch is only notable for Higuchi giving the finger.  Miller’s standup routine is out-of-place, as he’s given only two minutes to talk about his literal McJobs.  There’s a reliance on hoary jokes, like cowboys and injuns trading each other in a “hockey” pick-up game.

“Reserve Dogs,” a sketch from CMCN’s first season, is given a sequel.  Mr. Blonde has been replaced by Mr. Yellowcurry, an East Indian.  The sketch wields a heavy-handed message about the British historically treating East Indians and aboriginals wrong.  Ah, that subtle APTN humour.

Where the “Reserve Dogs” sketch excels is in its full-on Bollywood/Tarantino mashup.  That is a truly inspired moment, helped by a convincing dance routine and the fact that the sketch bleeds into the closing credits.  I sincerely hope CAUTION: May Contain Nuts has turned a quality corner.

This is the first of two CMCN episodes APTN will air during the XXI Olympic Winter Games.  The next episode will air February 21, 2010 at 11:30 PM ET on APTN East.  The odd scheduling must be due to APTN’s airing the Olympics, either that or APTN likes to play The Wacky Schedulin’ Game.

At least APTN doesn’t fill its Olympic broadcast time with tons of arse-stiffening filler between sporting events.  ARE YOU LISTENING, CTV?!  Wait, no, you’re not.