The Drunk and on Drugs Happy Funtime Hour (Action: Pope Productions/Happy Funtime Productions, 2011) is a case study in Canadian television not meeting its potential.  Drunk and on Drugs stars actors from Trailer Park Boys, one of the rare Canadian television phenomena of the past decade.  Amy Sedaris and Jay Baruchel, two reasonably popular celebrities, appear in small roles.  In addition, Drunk and on Drugs is the late Maury Chaykin’s episodic television swan song.

Where does Shaw Media air Drunk and on Drugs, then?  The channel it was originally slotted for, Showcase?  No, Shaw Media burns it off on an obscure Showcase spinoff channel, in the middle of July, two episodes at a time.  That’s a shame, as The Drunk and on Drugs Happy Funtime Hour is the best Canadian television I’ve seen so far this summer.

Robb Wells, Mike Smith and John Paul Tremblay play themselves, as they try to figure out why they’re in random predicaments (in a trashed motel room, inside a giant wooden penis) at the beginning of each episode.  Dr. Funtime (Maury Chaykin), who may or may not be a real scientist and/or Maury Chaykin, has created a blueberry-based hallucinogen that keeps the residents of Port Cockerton in line.

Wells, Smith and Tremblay are also kept in Port Cockerton, for reasons as yet unexplained.  Meanwhile, television executive K. Money (Amy Sedaris) is pissed off, as she tries to assemble hours of show footage into something remotely coherent.  I’m not sure what any of this means, if anything.

Wells, Smith and Tremblay play multiple characters throughout the show.  In lesser hands, Drunk and on Drugs would be a vanity project in the tradition of Single White Spenny and Good Dog.  Thankfully, The Drunk and on Drugs Happy Funtime Hour is an ambitious attempt at weaving multiple narratives into a cohesive whole.  Based on the first two episodes, it actually succeeds on this level.

Even given the show’s more outlandish elements (the armless Papa Karlson’s Feetza Pizza, the DJs of all-gay radio station CGAY, the geriatric mob family, Dr. Funtime), Drunk and on Drugs is fairly tightly plotted.  If Trailer Park Boys is Danger Man/Secret Agent, The Drunk and on Drugs Happy Funtime Hour is The Prisoner.  That’s not to say Drunk and on Drugs is as good as The Prisoner, just that the two shows inhabit the same plane of weirdness.  I’m interested to see how the remainder of Drunk and on Drugs pans out.

If you’re curious, the first two episodes of The Drunk and on Drugs Happy Funtime Hour are online at drunkandondrugs.com.  The episodes aren’t viewable outside Canada, but one can get around the geoblocking.  See?  Canadian television not meeting its potential.  I hope The Comedy Network doesn’t wrap a similar geofence around Picnicface.

In Short (Bravo!: Bravo!FACT/Bell Media, 2011) is an hour-long short-film program.  I don’t understand why short films aren’t televised more often.  If they are, they’re in shows like In Short and its spiritual predecessor, Bravo!FACT Presents.  At least Bravo! still funds new shorts, something The Comedy Network doesn’t do enough of.

In Short‘s chief weakness reveals itself within the first viewing.  In Short mostly shows clips from the shorts themselves, rather than the full shorts.  In effect, this is a long-form advertisement for Bravo!FACT.

This recap was originally going to be for thePOWERBOMB.com.  I’m not sure what’s going on there day-to-day right now, so fuck it, it’s here.  It’s not like I’m updating URBMN regularly these days.

This week’s Impact! begins with Sting revealing a new design for the TNA World Heavyweight Championship.  The belt looks nice.  Too bad the promotion is so shitty, but what’s another few thousand down the sinkhole?

Eric Bischoff and Hulk Hogan come out.  Sting says that evil Hulk Hogan turned Darth Hardy evil.  Hogan announces that Immortal has killed Hardy.  Enter Darth “Bully” Ray.  Ray, AJ Styles and Mr. Anderson come out and demand title shots, so the Anderson/RVD contender’s match – which wasn’t resolved at Victory Road 2011, fact fans – becomes a Fatal 4 Way.

I know I should be picking at the bones of this segment, but no one’s saying anything.  Anderson and Hogan go through a vaudeville routine.  Anderson back-drops himself for no reason.  RVD fails to come out.

Are the pay-per-views selling Impact! now?  All I know is, that’s a tsunami of wrestling, right there.  Impact! is like an earthquake after Jeff Hardy’s meltdown!  That might be a tasteless joke, but so is watching twenty-odd minutes of useless filler.

Madison Rayne defends her TNA Knockouts Championship in the third week of her Open Challenge.  This week, we reach right into the TNA Knockout ball bag for Alissa Flash.  They roll around, scream and act bitchy.  They don’t have a match, but who cares?  Men like tits, right?

The Pope D’Angelo Dinero comes out and “heals” people, still hating on Samoa Joe.  Samoa Joe chases The Pope, after The Pope beats up on/tortures Okada.  You might as well have The Pope and Samoa Joe masturbate on each other at this point.  That would be an athletic demonstration, at least.

Kurt Angle brains Jeff Jarrett with a guitar after the Angle/Jarrett peace talks break down.  Wow, Angle finally uses a weapon to hurt someone?  That’s about two weeks too late, but the Jeff Hardy Victory Road brouhaha has conveniently caused the Jarrett/Angle feud to be only the second-worst thing about TNA.  Fate’s awesome!

TNA remembers it has the Television Championship, letting Gunner, Murphy and Rob Terry at it.  Gunner wins, since TNA and fuck you.

Matt Morgan, Angelina Love and Winter fight Hernandez, Sarita and Rosita.  Why two disparate angles are lumped together like this, I don’t know.  Who won?  Certainly not fans of decent wrestling.

Wait, I realized the Mexicans in TNA are now part of a supergroup!  How Mexicools!

Last on the agenda is the #1 contender’s match.  RVD and Mr. Anderson hit the double pin, which is nice, since it draws out a feud instead of setting a strong tone for Lockdown 2011.  Good use of “Bully” Ray and AJ Styles, by the way, having them be an added attraction instead of the main event itself.

Also, what a useful bump AJ took.  It makes the kayfabe injury angle the highlight of the show…which isn’t saying much, given the awesome entertainment shown before the #1 contender’s match.  There were, I think, tits and half-naked men.  Oh, and Hulk Hogan babbling.  Fun.

What an exciting, non-retarded version of Impact!  I’m proud to have watched that thing.

Space Knights Go! (Teletoon: daCapo Productions/Big Hug Productions/Fatkat Animation, 2009) is one of those rare Teletoon Pilot Project shows directly connected to the man behind the curtain, in this case Loogaroo owner Gene Fowler.  Fowler is a frequent commenter on Canadian Animation Resources.  I’ve even e-mailed Fowler regarding Space Knights Go!‘s development.

Fowler was the owner of Fatkat Animation, a studio that went bankrupt twice in its ten-year history before becoming Loogaroo.  I’m sure Fowler reads URBMN from time to time, or else he wouldn’t have left a comment on an article which has nothing to do with him.

At the same time, I’m reviewing Space Knights Go!, not Fowler’s business practices and online demeanour.  I don’t know what it’s like at Fatkat/Loogaroo.  I’m also sure Fowler can’t resist any sort of publicity, so here’s the review.

This review of Nerdland (Teletoon: Cuppa Coffee Studios, 2008) is rather late in coming.  I wasn’t sure how to review the show, since Nerdland‘s credited writer is Teletoon’s current director of original content, Alan Gregg.

If Gregg is a front for the animators, Nerdland could at least pay a writer to take credit for the script (see: Angora Napkin.)  To be fair, Gregg was at Brown Bag Films when Nerdland was in production, but it still gives Nerdland the inside track for a greenlight.

With Nerdland‘s online popularity and Cuppa Coffee’s track record, a series greenlight might very well happen.  That’s a shame, as the pilot sucks.

This might destroy URBMN’s flimsy ties to objectivity, but I was not looking forward to Drop Dead Gorgeous (Teletoon: CINEMARIA, 2009.)  Mike Valiquette’s review of the show is negative.  When the Teletoon Pilot Project was in its web phase, DDG was just hated by Detour viewers, even more than the puppet-based antics of Les Sansfil/The Wireless Family.

All I have to say is, wow.  Drop Dead Gorgeous is worse than I expected it would be.  I’m not offended by its cheap stereotypes and unfunny humour, per se.  I’m just confused by it.  I can’t pinpoint DDG‘s intentions, other than “is this edgy enough, Teletoon?  Is this edgy enough?  Lesbians, wheee!“

As an experiment this year, I thought I’d liveblog the 25th Annual Gemini Awards.  I livetweeted the 24th Gemini Awards Broadcast Gala last year.  I’m one of the few Canadians to give a flying poop about this sort of thing.  It’s an illness.  I need a woman.  Barring that, I need an excuse to give a flying fig about the Toronto Maple Laughs.

What I’m really looking forward to tonight is Ed the Sock’s This Movie Sucks!, since it promises to be new, but the Geminis make for fun viewing.  The Geminis really are the Bizarro Emmys.  Also, the Broadcast Gala’s 90 minutes long.  Unlike the Emmys, the Geminis don’t fuck around.

I have a personal interest in the Gemini Awards this year, since I’m following two shows in two categories: Pure Pwnage for Best Comedy Program or Series, and Durham County for Best Dramatic Series.

Also, the Broadcast Gala realized it can’t subsist on a diet of Mike Reno and Theo Tams, so this year features Elvis Costello, Feist and some off-key hobo.  Cory Monteith is the host.  Monteith promises to be funnier than Ron James, and Cory Monteith isn’t a comedian.

Granted, the Gemini Awards won’t be cool this year.  The Academy of Canadian Cinema & Television would have to stop giving out 100 awards a year for that to happen.  At least I’m not liveblogging the Genie Awards.  That’s the real dead zone when it comes to Canadian awards shows.

Teletoon’s edging close to the lesser parts of its Pilot Project, now that Ninjamaica (Teletoon: Lenz Entertainment, 2008) has aired.  After this, there’s Celebutard Nation, Nerdland, Drop Dead Gorgeous, Chinatown Cops and Space Knights.  I’m looking forward to none of those pilots.

Granted, I wasn’t looking forward to Ninjamaica until I saw parts of it on YouTube a few months ago.  Ninjamaica isn’t perfect, but I don’t hate it.  If I’m to choose between Angora Napkin and Ninjamaica, I have to take AN, but Ninjamaica has some good qualities.  I honestly never thought I’d say that about a show reliant on a portmanteau.